10 Types of Worst Friend Ever

Just a personal opinion of the 'friends' I have met throughout my secondary school and poly life.

Not meant to offend anyone, but if you know which kind of friends you are, time for some reflection.

1) 'Friends' who backstabbed you

I have been through this kind of things countless of times. Definitely more than the amount that i can count with my fingers. 

"Hey bro, I support you till the end" 

Yes, they told you this. But guess what, the moment you turned, you have no idea whether they are smiling at you. An evil smile. 

Then you heard from your friends that this 'brother' of yours has been speaking behind your back. 

"This bastard, he really think that i support him? Fat hope. He's a fucking loser." 

He act like your FRIEND, but in fact, he isn't. You treated him as a friend, but in fact, he is a 'FRENEMY'. 

2) 'Friends' who put aeroplane

Yes, we often have friends who ask you out at times. Or rather, we 'booked' them in advance. Probably 1 weeks. One example of what i experienced. I booked 1 month in advance. If you were in that situation, do you expect your friends to check their schedule and get back to you? 

Oh yes, i did expect that. Replies i got was "yes i can", "i think i can" , "steady la" etc.

Never trust this bunch of people who put aeroplanes no matter in what kind of situation. 

Because even if you remind them 1 week before the 'booking', they will tell you "got ah?" , 

"since when you ask sia?" "never say earlier!" etc.

This type of friends are definitely not your TRUE FRIEND.

3) 'Friends' who will pay you back next time and doesn't

I haven't actually experience this before, not because i don't lend people money. But most friends that i lent money to are people who trust.

But admit it guys, we often saw people sharing posts and tweets on Facebook and twitter about this guy or girl owing money for 1 year plus already and yet to pay back.

Well, there are two sides to the story. We won't judge on that. But don't you hate it when people won't pay you back even if they said they will back then? 

4) 'Friends' that don't have time for you...

Friends that don't have time for you but has time for their classmates. Wow. Simply unbelievable. I've been through this for numerous of times, and it just sucks so much. 

A - "Hey dude, any free time for lunch this few days?" 

B - "Hey there, so sorry i don't have time this few days. I need to rush my projects"

And then for the rest of the days, you walked past the canteen and you saw him with his bunch of ladies and gentlemen having lunch together. Instant feeling of 'betrayal'.

5) 'Friends' who are only willing to accompany you when their partners are away.

It's the fact somehow. We rarely get to see our friends when they are in a romantic relationship. I'm not trying to say that get out of that relationship and spend more time with me. I would say, go for a balanced relationship between your partner and your friends.

But it seems really bastard when this friend of yours decide to accompany you ONLY when his/her partner is away. It seems like he/she only make time for his/her partner.

6) The friend who swears she won’t tell anyone that huge secret you just accidentally told her...

Admit it, we always have this friend in our life. And the next day, the whole school knows about it. And this huge secret that you told her usually is this small crush that you have. 

Seems like you gonna have a little bit of awkward moment with that crush of yours.

7) The friends who constantly brag about every single thing.

"Hey, this is my new phone!"

"WOW. I had starbucks today!"

"I have this friend of mine who treated me to a great dinner!"

Enough said. You don't seems like you care.  Ear plug please.

8) The friends that take 1 full day or more to reply you...

I really hate this so much. It can literally burn 1000 calories out of my daily calories intake just to wait for the reply. 

It seems impossible to make plans with him/her. And when you finally do, he/she inevitably cancel it or reschedule it with some lousy excuses.

9) The friends that insist on having this and that

Trust me. When we get into big group or cliques, there are bound to have conflict. There will be one friend who wants to eat Mac, then the other one wants KFC, then there's a friend who want to eat healthily like salad.

Then this friend of yours insist on eating mac and everyone follow suits. It seems everyone is giving in every time. 

10) The friends that will add a little bit of sarcasm to every sentence they make...

"Hey, you look good, for someone like your size."

We really hate this kind of people. I know there are times that we can be really comfortable with each other like "Hey you fucker. ". Of course we know it's a damn joke.

But hey, there isn't any need for that sarcasm. And that isn't funny at all.

Perhaps we should make a comment to him/her like 

"Hey, you seemed busy with everything. Busy fucking your bloody mind too?"

Nah, I doubt we want to be like him/her either. Sucks to be like him/her anyway.

-------

so.. if you ever have this kind of friends, I would suggest DUMP them seriously. They are like toxic to you. Ready to fuck your mind, torture you mentally. 

Leaders are made, not born.

CAUTION: RISK OF GETTING A BAD IMPRESSION OF ME.

Before I begin, I will like to say that it took me a lot of courage to come up with this post, especially when i know that if i ever come up with a post that is kind of showing off to others, some haters will just find fault with me. 

Nonetheless, I decided to do up this post to prove that I'm not someone who shows off but someone who is speaking from real experience from how I was just a typical normal student to a leader that I am now.

"Leaders are made, not born."

As quoted, everyone is not born to be a leader. You don't see a newborn baby shouting "charge!" at the first minute right? Everyone can be a leader, it's just whether there is any right opportunities and the suitable environment for one to develop their leadership skills.

There are different kind of leaders. I must admit that I met different kind of leaders but not all.

There are good ones that are willing to help you when you face trouble as a leader. Then there are those not so good ones that throw you with shitty work that you have to do no matter what.

Nonetheless, be prepared to face different kind of leaders and learn from experience.

I was just a normal typical secondary student that was enjoying life in school. I wasn't good in studies either. I must admit that i got into troubles before such as getting into fights in school. HAHAHA it's guys nature to get into violence.

The key to successful leadership today is influence, not authority —Kenneth Blanchard

1) Greendale Broadcasting Corporation - Chairperson

But the question that changes everything was...

"I think you suit the criteria to be the chairperson of the CCA. Do you want to consider it?"

This question was asked by my CCA teacher, Ms Lee.

I must say that I wasn't very sure of what to do at that point of time. I know I was god damn happy that I suit the criteria and was approached by the teacher. It was like my wish to like control the whole CCA as and when I like.  At that point of time, i never thought that leadership was such a never ending experience.  I thought it's like a great chance to be part of planning logistics, manpower etc. I gladly took up the offer, not knowing of the dangers and risks ahead of me.

As I was invested as the Chairperson of my CCA, I felt a sense of pride. It was something i never experience before. Even my mum don't even know that I'm being invested as the Chairperson of my CCA.  HAHAHA.

I thought being the chairperson of the CCA is an easy task. It turns out not to be it.

For the first few months, I struggled to meet the expectations of the others. 

One thing that I never wanted to mention again was the conflict between me and my Vice Chairperson. There was a slight misunderstanding between him and the teacher, thus resulting in the conflict. 

Honestly speaking, I must admit that at that point of time, it was really hard to cope with that stress and conflict. I didn't have any idea what to do or even a solution to reduce the conflict. 

The only thing we know is that we use our voices to settle it. The one who is louder wins.

Even the talks between the both of us was probably meant to end in worsen conflict.

At that point of time, I really wish I have never accepted that offer. But it was too late anyway.

Because of this conflict and tremendous stress, my health declined. Ultimately, I fall. 

I was in the hospital, talking to my mum about how I feel. That moment was probably the only time that I was able to vomit everything out of my heart and chest. I felt such a great relief.

It was the best moment yet.

As I recovered from that panic attack, I tried my best to avoid any further conflicts with him but at the same time maintain the working relationship with him. I consulted many of my seniors and friends. I even broke down in front of my coach in the Leadership Challenge Camp. That was the time where i really felt so relieved. Tonnes of advices and skills was taught and passed down from my coach to me.  After the camp, I realised that

Leadership is not just a position, it's about the experience, strategy, mindset, maturity, responsibility and commitment of one. 

It took me many months to get over the conflict, accept the aftermath and move on with the amount of time before i stepped down.

(Pic: Group shot with the Seniors, Principal, Vice Principal and Ex Vice Principal in Greendale Honours Day 2011)

My definition of leadership is this: We are never a leader when success is all about us growing and learning new things. We are a leader only when we pass down the stuffs we learnt and help to grow others. 

After what it seems to be the first and most terrifying incident of my leadership journey, I was faced with a bigger challenge.  Managing a CCA with more than 120 members when Infocomm and GBC merged as one.  It was stressful. But it was worth it. 

This amount of members may be too much, but I was ready to face the challenge. 

I am not alone. Together with Ben, Xavier and a few other leaders in Infocomm, we managed to plan and organised a camp and also a games day kind of thing.

(Pic: GBC Games Day in 2012)

(Pic: 'Event Backbone' of Greendale Honours Day in 2012)

All in all, the leadership journey as the Chairperson of Greendale Broadcasting Corporation (GBC) was indeed a great experience. It was something that was unfamiliar to me at first. Throughout my term of office, I learnt many things from various people. For example, I have learnt many things from Xavier in that short period of time. His leadership was way better than me. I must say there are a lot of things that I have yet to learn at that point of time. Other include management of crisis, creation of teamwork, enhance the flow of operations as well as motivating people to do their best in whatever they could.

The position and the badges I received is only the 1st stage of the Leadership model. What matter most is when people knows how good you are in term of leadership that they are willing to trust you with whatever they can in order to make an event or project successful.

2) Greendale Broadcasting Corporation - Senior Advisory Board (SAB) - Director

As the ex-chairperson of GBC, one thing I wasn't able to let go was the presidency selection of the CCA. Together with Ben and Xavier, we managed to come up with a board named Senior Advisory Board (SAB) to provide advice especially in terms of management. The SAB is more focused on the annual presidency selection. 

(Pics: SAB involvement in Greendale CCA fair 2013)

(Pic: Full attendance of SAB during Chinese New Year Celebration 2013)

Although there were little of appearance, there are times where we go back to the CCA to observe how it is being run. For example, I just came back from the full dress rehearsal for honours day on Friday and I must say I have observed quite a lot from the way the CCA works as well as their event management.

Being in this board really help to train myself to be better in observing how people does their work and provide feedbacks, advices when deemed necessary. It's not about the technical skills anymore. I trust my juniors that they can pass down these skills to the next batches. But one thing that is difficult to grab hold of it is the management skills. I'm not saying I don't trust my juniors in managing the whole team. I must admit that at this age, we tend to see things so easily, thinking that a problem can be solved so easily. I've been through it and I know it the best. 

My aim is to eradicate that thinking by providing the best advices I can give through observations. That is what I should do, as a Senior Advisor. 

Leadership and learning are indispensable to each other. —John F. Kennedy

The Untold Truth

As i placed my McFlurry on the seat beside me, i begin to wonder, was the decision i made before the right one? Was i under influence of someone or something that made me feel so clear of what I am doing? There are a lot of questions i want to ask myself. But usually, it yield nothing.

I wish i could tell someone how i feel. But everytime when i approach someone, my lips and mouth became numb. My tongue seems to be super-glued by someone. I wish i could better face up to reality.

Just yesterday, i felt a kind of love. It wasn't the kind of love that we had for another partner. Its the kind of love which everyone come together work towards a common goal and getting job down. Yes, its teamwork in a group. But what it emit was the love of friendship, brotherhood as well as a team. I haven't felt this kind of love ever since i left the team.

I swear upon my grave that for the first time, this love felt so special. Special than anything.

Although I left the team, but there's still a part of me that want to be in the team. I just couldn't let it go.

Another part of me was filled with guilt. I feel so guilty of shirking away my responsibility, and putting so much stress and work on the others. Especially when a 6-person team have to do 7-person work. I just dont get what i was trying to do here. I asked myself, what have i been doing for the past half year?

"Have you ever regret the decision that you made?"

In the past, i would say no. But now, I really truly regret the fact that i made that decision.

That decision of mine affect many people, in terms of their life and so on. But when that decision was made, all the responsibility ended. It seems that it has ended. But apparently, it haven't. I got to face the result of it.

The aftermath. The real true feelings. The reality.

It has become a nightmare for me everynight.

Sometime, i just couldn't believe that i threw off my responsibility in order to chase after something that i want.

Which in fact, when i managed to get it, the feeling from those sacrifices I made are much overwhelming than the happiness of attaining my goal.

Honestly, i wish i can really do something about this.

"At the end of every tunnel, there always a light shining upon you." - Desmond R.

Should we or should we not pay?

Well well. So I was looking through Facebook as well as other news site about the recent MH370 disappearance over the Vietnamese Airspace and I happened to came across this blog post by this female blogger and it was about...

"Why Guys Should Not Pay On The First Date"

And i read through it. Honestly speaking, sometimes we wonder about this question.

Should we or should we not pay for the other party?

And we really get stuck in a situation that is like between life and death.  It apparently means choosing a choice that may result the lady having a good impression of you, which is only a 50% probability. 

There are different views out there and I'm not saying that the blogger, Deborah is wrong either. We do have different ways of viewing things and it's great that Deborah actually feels that she shouldn't expect a guy to pay the bill on the first date.

After all, it hands down to 3 possible situations.

1. You pay the entire bill

2. She pay the entire bill

3. Split the bill and pay equally

But of course, it depends on the lady that you're having the date with.  You will have to understand her personality, through her dressing, the way she talked and the first impression that she gave you. 

Sometimes, we guys don't know how to judge a person. And then, we made the wrong judgement. And yes, the judging process here is somewhat relevant to the judgemental society here. It's either we judge a person favourably or unfavourably. 

I managed to speak to a few of my friends regarding this issue as well. We guys would usually pay on the first date because society portray as this way.  One scenario. Most of the time we will see guys proposing to a girl, but we rarely and maybe don't even see a lady proposing to a guy. 

It's the same kind of situation, but it's a matter of who taking the initiative. 

But most of the times, the way society portray us guys interfere with our thinking.

So what happens why you insist on paying when the lady actually said no? 

It just practically make the lady feel insulted.  Why? Because you're somehow making them feel like they can't afford it or even you buying their time just for a date. 

But what happens if we don't pay for the lady?

Well, it just make you look so ungentlemanly and make the lady feel cheap.

So what is my stand?  I would definitely offer to pay for the ladies first. 

1. Instigation of the (First) Date

Who ask who in this case? Was it the guy who asked the ladies out first or the other way round? Don't be bothered about this.  Just pay.  It would be normal for a guy to pay for the ladies. After all, you will probably managed to schedule another date with that beloved lady and she can pay for it the next date.  (that's most of the ladies will do, but not all.)

If it's you who instigated the date. Just pay. Because it's you, that's why she came to a date with you.
Imagine when the girl looks at you, expecting you to pay when the bills come. You don't want to look pathetic when you can't seems to pay for the bill, do you? But most of us can pay since it's the 21st Century as we have our debit and credit card ready for swiping.

Well, that brings us to our next point.


2. Impression of You.
Well, when we pay for the ladies, it does not only just show that we are gentlemen. It also shows that we have the responsibility, steady and well established. Some women are like this, they would think whether you are relationship-ready or not.  And it also shows your sincerity in asking her out for a date. You won't want to ruin her impression of you by not paying anyway. After all, if you're aiming to go after her, your impression must be good.  A girl won't want to have a boyfriend that is selfish, petty and doesn't take the initiative.


3. Special Occasions
If you asked her out because it's a special occasion like her birthday or her achievements, then yes, you should offer to pay. It will make you look classy and gracious. Just don't let her know about the price of the meal since i'm expecting you to bring her to a classy restaurant or hotel for a meal. Tell her it's on you.


4. She's testing you!
There are different ways of testing you.  Always take note, lady can be very crafty. No offence but yes.  For example, she can offer to pay for you. But take note, not all ladies are doing this for no reasons.  Whether if she is doing it subconsciously or not, it really test how you are going to react.  Sounds harsh.

Always remember, on the first date, she is trying to know about you. What kind and type of guys are you? Are you generous? Are you responsible?

That are just some reasons that i will offer to pay for the lady that I'm having a date with. 

But there are sometimes when ladies will offer to pay first even though you have offered to pay.

What should you do? 

Yet, another life and death situation. Well, you will really have to choose the right choice, especially when personality differ from person to person. 

If you insist to pay more, it just shows that you value her a lot. Society value money. But you value her, paying for the meal shows it.  Yes, I mentioned above that you may be buying her but it also shows that you have value for her.  

Most of the times, it will usually end up with the guy paying for it. However if you suay suay kena a lady who is very insisting. Convince her that she can pay for a movie later or next time. 

That's how you would keep the future date scheduled!

Well, i believe that you somewhat knows what to do when dealing about who to pay for the first date. 

Anyway, before a date, we guys should understand about the lady that we intend to have a date with. Try to find out what they like, their usual habits etc. This will really help you with a successful date!

Those Sleepless Nights' thoughts.

Don't you always hate it when you have those sleepless night ?  Those action of rolling on the bed, trying to get up and go to the toilet, just to lie to yourself that you just opened your eyes for a moment and heading back to sleep soon.   Well, its not the case.  

Why are there those nights that you cant even have a wink of sleep? 3 reasons.
1. You woke too late and trying to sleep early
2. You have something in mind that you dont even have a clue about.
3. You're troubling over something.

Well, apparently, all 3 reasons had been my causes for those sleepless night in the past.

We all have something to trouble about. And its just so annoying to be unable to sleep because of that.

I often ask myself this, what should i do?

Honestly, i spent most of my sleepless night trying to think of solutions.  Which only a few work.

While sometimes, i actually look back at the past, telling me how far i have came, how much things i have sacrificed, and those stuffs that i have regretted giving up.

I would say, the stuffs that i have regretted giving up is the most troubling ones.  Some people would ask me, do i regret my action to give up a particular stuffs.   

I lied to myself and them, and said no. I dont even regret it because I gave up to search for and chase after  better dreams.

But as time goes by, it's definitely disheartening to look back at the past, those moment of the stuffs that you have given up on.  It just suck isn't it.  And by then, when you want that back, its too late.  You have given up all of it, getting it back is hard.  Even if you're successful in getting it back, are you sure you will be happy ?  Are you sure you won't have the same feelings as before, which may result you to give up once again?  Look, its just a never ending cycle. 

The solution? Its either you give up completely and dont allow your heart and mind to shake because of those moments you had OR you dont give up in the first place.

Apparently, most of us are left with only the first solution.  Well it isnt bad either.

The second solution will not guarantee you to be happy and comfortable in that situation before you give up.  It's probably a never ending cycle unless you or the other parties have a different perceptions. 

Would you want that to be the result? Yes, you have a chance to be alright in that situation again, but what are the amount of chances in attaining a success?

Personally, i would choose to take the 1st solution. I would rather give up completely and have no regrets.  Better said than done.  It's never that easy. It takes time, effort and the correct mindset.  But this will definitely guarantee you, a better perspective of the world and your surroundings. 

So what would you choose? 

 A better perspective of the world and the surrounding OR getting stuck in that hole of despair which has minimal chances of getting out?

Sympathy and Attention

"Everything is going to be alright"

-

"Are you alright?"

- 

"What happened?"

-

"You'll feel better"

These are just some of the questions that people mentioned to you when you're down.
Yes, it do show that they care from the outside.
But how many of them are actually concerned about your well-being?

Just because they're asking these questions, it doesn't mean they actually care about you.
Probably they just feel that there's a need to.
But tell me, how many are there who are willing to offer you a listening ear and their time to listen to all of your craps and nonsense?

Honestly speaking. Really honest. I really wished there are people who insist on asking or probe more when i said i'm fine, i'm alright. Perhaps that's just what us, humans need.
Sympathy & Attention.

Ask yourself this, have you never ever thought of gaining the attention of others in order for them to better understand us? Or just gaining the attention because you just want to be famous?

Face the reality, all of us wants attention from people around us.
Sometimes, it really set me thinking. Why are these people asking me whether if i'm alright and then when i said not really, they just said, everything is going to be alright.

I mean, you don't even know what happened, and you're telling me everything is going to be alright?
Yes, it is certainly that everything is going to be alright, but have you ever thought of giving advices and some support?

Have you ever thought of providing someone the best listening ear you have?

And there are really a lot of people out there thinking that trying to gain sympathy/attention is a ridiculous thing.
They just go "wa this bitch trying to gain attention because she chio"


Hello? Just because she's pretty and you're saying that she's a bitch? Why not look at yourself in the mirror before judging others? Are you better compared to her?
And just because she is pretty, you're saying she's gaining attention?

It's like that person practically made the issue of gaining attention a ridiculous and something that is unwanted.
But, have that person ever thought of watching himself/herself making that comment?

From my point of view, I would definitely say that comment was very ridiculous and unwanted.


Ask ourselves this, have we ever wanted to gain attention and sympathy from others?
I believe everyone does it in the past, now and then.

For example, you're sad. You don't just hide one corner and cry alone don't you?
It's more like,

1. You cry.
2. Stop crying halfway then tweet "i'm crying so hard now" , "why did this happened?"
3. Go back crying again.
4. Check replies from your followers


And if you were to ask me, whether i did it before. Yes, i did it.
Everyone, at some point in life, want to gain attention and sympathy.
So, give attention and sympathy to someone who really needs it, especially those who are down.

Stop making those ridiculous comments because it's not going to help.

Haters

“Haters and bullies are always cowards, you know. They like to pick on little guys.” - Scylar Tyberius

Yes, i can tell you I'm not bothered by the actions from my haters.  But who on earth, deep down below in their heart, can choose to ignore the fact that there's someone who hates on them without knowing why?

Don't you feel so maligned when someone accused you of something that you once never did before nor even have the slightest intention to do it? Apparently, you have never came across such people who could even curse on your parents for no apparent reasons, other than people who were trying to kid with you by mentioning 'kpkb' in any situation.  It just sucks to know that deep down below in your heart, there are people who wished that you were dead, never born or get out of their life.

Often, i get people telling me, 'hey, you're so social and friendly. I think you have never ending amount of friends"

Are you mad bruther?! Me, having never ending amount of friends? What a fucking joke. 

All of us could never ending amount or countless amount of friends, but who are those who stood by you when you needed help, a shoulder to cry on, a listening ear to hear all your bitching? Those are your great and true friends.

To certain amount of people, i seem like a cheerful and happy-go-lucky kind of people on the outside, but how many of you have thought of even coming into my life and experience how is it for me to live my own life?  You might even regret coming to think of how it is like. 

Seriously, you want to judge me because of something that people accused me of doing? Or judging me based on YOUR assumptions? 

Don't assume and never judge on your assumptions.

Because you may never even know your perception could be wrong. But it definitely proves one thing, it defines who you really are.  A sore loser who could only judge a person baselessly. 

We all have been there, done it.  We all judge, but make sure we judge with something that is proven.

No one is guilty unless proven. In the court, the accused isn't guilty unless the judge find him guilty, isn't it right?

I have enough of people who tried to make up stories, coming up with all sort of lies just to bring me down and even trying to manipulate others to hate on me. But why hate on someone whom you do not know about.

"You know my name but you don't know my stories" 

Tell me how often do you see this quote lying around somewhere on the internet? And how many of you actually retweeted this quote when it's on twitter before. I bet most of you does it. 

What's the most ridiculous thing?  People who anonymously hate on me.  I'm fine with that, but are you sure you really know me that well bro?! Have you even question yourself, how reliable are the remarks that you have made to me?  Having first impression about me is fine, but no one ever assume about first impression.  And have you ever thought about knowing more about me so that you can compare your current impression against your first impression.  I bet there's a big    gap in between that.

So you sure you wanna continue assuming? You can choose to continue but how about me telling the whole world that your parents failed to bring you up and that lead to bitching and assuming about me?  Do you like it? Or am I even suppose to treat your parents like this? 

If yes, why the heck should you even assume about me, hate on me whatsoever?

I'm perfectly fine with the extra gain of haters that i'm gonna have due to this post, but you guys still don't understand who i am. All you know can be, " oh desmond? that pathetic bastard?"  or something like "oh that piece of shit who rant on his blog about his haters?"

Honestly speaking, i have no idea how questions i received on my ask.fm (or even my answers) portrayed myself on the internet. But you wanna judge? Continue judging, but how well are you able to determine one's personality just based on his/her social networks, pictures on instagram or even this blog?

You have to get to know me personally. 

My first reaction when i got this question was that, I was super raged. It's not about someone who thinks that i'm ugly and annoying. Neither is it that i'm making a fool out of myself and the post on twitter is ridiculously annoying.  It's about that two words "just saying".

You don't go around insulting people and just add these two words "just saying" or even "no offence" .

Again, so how do you feel when i insult your parent that i mention above and i just mention "just saying"

Don't you feel offended? Do you that two words really make a difference to your insult?

Does it change your insult to a positive insult?

For your info, 

in·sult

verb

inˈsəlt/

1. 1.

   speak to or treat with disrespect or scornful abuse.

So do you even understand the word "insult" now? You're treating someone with disrespect, and yet you said, just saying no offence.  You think it really help that person think that hey that person is respecting me by saying those two words? 

CLAIM 1:  Asking myself question on ask.fm - 

Tell me who the heck does that on ask.fm. Honestly speaking, I have never ever once ask myself question on ask.fm.  Believe it or not, your choice.  And pathetic? Are you sure I'm pathetic when you're trying to make up some stories just to bring me down?  Who's the one pathetic here?

CLAIM 2: No one cares whether if i start studying - 

Again, some people choose to assume that nobody cares. So tell me, are you trying to say I'm asking myself question again so that it shows that people are concern about my academic issues?  I have no time for that.

So what if i have already started studying, does it concern you?  Honestly, i feel very insecure even if i studied. It's like to me, i didn't even study at all. Here's the problem of perceptions again.

CLAIM 3: You shouldn't be in DPA. How the heck did you get in?

Why shouldn't I be in DPA?  

Does the exercise restricts students that are physically disabled? Apparently, it doesn't. Proof? There's a physical disabled freshies in TP DPA.  So if he can, why can't I?

And i proven my worth to pass the exercise through the Course Manager. So are you saying my Course Manager is blind?  Honestly, you guys are just being jealous of me. Seriously, get a life and stop trying to pull people down.

 CLAIM 4: You think you well liked as Group Leader?

Another assumption. 

CLAIM 5: ZEUS

Another hater that tries to bring me down. Apparently, you're gonna fail.

Zeus were practically the main clique that i have in DPA. So if you think that i created this clique myself that contains only me in the group. Maybe you wanna scroll down more.

They were ones who are in the clique. So who are you to assume that it's only me in the clique?

Friends who are close to me usually tells me, hey ignore those people, it will be fine, it will be over soon. 

Yes, i want to ignore. I want it to be fine. I want it to be over soon. 

But on the other side, I want to make a stand. I'm not going to allow those people to bring me down, i stand up against those bitches and bastards.

I don't know why. It just make me feel so insecure, annoyed and emotional.

So you think i like it? You think i like to get judged and criticised for every actions that i take, and then when i fall, people are just gonna say I'm seeking attention.

Even if i fall, you're the reason why i fell. But fat hope, that won't happen.

I may not know how to deal with it when people hates on me, throwing vulgarities at me...

But one thing i'm gonna do is to stand up against it.

I don't care how many more haters i gain because of me going against it.

So here's a question, do i hate you (haters) ?

Not at all.

But it's just so sad to know that you guys do not appreciate my existence and the difference i could make.

And how do i feel after gaining so much hatred?

Honestly speaking, you won't understand the pain unless you going through it 

Lastly, if you want to continue accusing me of things that i have never done before or trying to bring me down by saying i deserve it, i shouldn't have done that, i'm an attention seeker then shouldn't you think about yourself?

You're giving me all the hates and attentions. Not me.

Every single one of you, who are reading this post, don't think that i'm trying to gain sympathy or attention or trying to dissolve the hatred that people have on me. But what i'm trying, is to express my thoughts that are buried deep down in my heart, how I exactly feel to be hated upon. Perhaps, some of you may have experienced it before and really feel me. But do you think that hating on me without knowing how is my life like, is doing me justice?

Year of the Mane.

As i start this to write this post, I'm still thinking of how this post will be like.

There's a lot for me to update on, so please bear with me, especially this long post.

Happy Lunar New Year to all of my readers!

(I know it's a bit late though, but we celebrate it for 15 days, don't we?)

So let me start off with Chinese New Year eve, alright.

----

Chinese New Year eve, 30th January 2014

Thank goodness that there isn't any lessons on that day. I was pretty sure that I won't be attending any lessons for the eve since the first day of 2014!  Of course, it made my visit to my alma mater for the Chinese New Year celebration possible. 

I was quite disappointed that most of us (in the exco) can't make it due to studies and tutorial. But no worries, exams are coming up and i definitely feel them. I just happened to make it since there wasn't any tutorials lol. 

The excos present were me, Ben and Calista. 

I never thought about joining in in the celebration at first since i was about to leave for Malaysia in the afternoon. But it was the 'LouHei' that attracted my attention. lol. I bet you didn't know that. 

The performance was actually quite boring to me, and i was really hoping that it will be over. But still, I must thank those who managed to make this celebration happen. I mean, there should still be some appreciation isn't it?

Overall, the attendance were pretty fair and expected. Great to see those teachers and those fresh graduates again back in Greendale.  

So this year, like previously, I'm returning to my Grandmother house at Muar Town in Malaysia. Definitely did encountered heavy traffic throughout the whole journey. And i believe that most of you went overseas? (especially when I saw one of my friends leaving for Seoul just before Chinese New Year)

Honestly, I hope I'm able to go overseas alone or with my friends one day. (*hint hint*)

Anyway, I'm quite surprised that there is a Baskin Robbins outlet in the middle of the expressway in Malaysia. Managed to get the double scoop Regular size at only RM15.80. Okay, maybe a little bit cheaper than Singapore though. lol. Here's a selfie and a shot with my mum. 

MUAR TOWN

So after about 1 plus hour on the expressway, we reached Muar Town and like many times previously, we definitely need some FRESH petrol. hahaha. Anyway here's a photo of the shophouse in Muar Town. I remembered taking photo of this shophouse last year in the morning, just before the sun rises. 

*Fast Forward to 11.30pm*

The sky of Muar Town is spectacular. You could even see dozens of stars with your naked eyes. That's because of low light pollution there compared to Singapore. Unfortunately, i didn't really have the equipments that i need in order to take those "milky way" or "galaxy" kind of photo. (PROMISE: NEXT TIME)

I kinda regret that I did not bring along my tripod as well and I actually have to use a box as a tripod.

(See this: https://twitter.com/21december_/status/428935266187755521/photo/1 )

Nevertheless i did managed to take some great shots! 

And one thing great about being in Malaysia is that we get to shoot fireworks without police intervention etc.  

And I happened to be on a field when the clock struck 12am.  Guess what happened? I was surrounded with fireworks shooting up in the sky. It's like all those debris coming down from the sky, landing on the field. And gosh, I'M IN THE FIELD. I'm literally in the centre of the fireworks shooting area. But the good thing is that I managed to see something that is being rarely seen in Singapore.  

Chinese New Year Day 1, 31st January 2014

Outfit of the Day: Aeropostale X Denim Jean X Lee Cooper

Started the day with quite a number of bangs as i mentioned earlier on. It's going to be a great year ahead. The first house that we visited was in Malacca and we took about 45mins to get there. 

So it wasn't a relative that we visited but an old best friend of my mum, whom used to rent a room in the old house of mine in Kovan when I was very young.  Apparently, i didn't have any memory about her. 

Anyway, I wished i could stay longer in Malacca as it was like my first time there in like about 4-5years.  There's lot of great scenery there, like the famous red houses. Ahh. I shall visit it the next time! 

Selfies of the Day

After that  (short)  Malacca visit, we visited my aunt house back at Muar and I was really bored, so i took a photo with their Merc. lol

 Chinese New Year Day 2, 1st February 2014

Outfit of the day and its detail.

Abercrombie and Fitch X Rolex X Lee Cooper X Denim Jeans

Managed to take a full extended family photo on the third day in order to welcome our new family member, JiaJun. (baby cousin, he's gonna be 3 soon!)  Our previous family photo was only taken like, in 2010 during my uncle's wedding.  So it's like surprising and a fun thing to do this year! And it was my idea to actually take a full extended family photo.  And I'll be framing it up and hang it in my Grandmother's house. 

After that messy and noisy discussion of getting who to stand here and there, we finally set off to visit some relatives and I swear the weather in Muar is really unforgiving. It's like around 33Deg Cel in the day and about 23DegCel in the night.  How i wish it's cooler. (*hint hint*)

Photo with my Beloved Sister

Chinese New Year Day 3, 2nd February 2014

Outfit of the Day

Polka Dots Shirt X Rolex X Denim Chino Shorts X Lee Cooper

Was back in Singapore around 4pm in the afternoon and you will never believe what we actually bring in with us. 100packets of Otah ! Enough for a whole year. This Otah brand is actually 'XiaoMei Otah' from Muar.  We managed to find it after some searching on the net. Heard about this brand previously when my mum went to Batu Pahat last year and she brought some back! It taste better than the usual one we bought from Muar ever year. 

Well, about 40 plus packets are actually ours though. The rest are for gifts or distribution.

In addition, there are also gifts like wife cakes, salted bean cakes etc brought from YongSeng gift shop. (the one and only F&B gift shop that we rely on)

The whole boot of the car was actually filled with goods and foods. My goodness. There's barely enough space to accommodate our luggage. 

And then, the favourite part of Chinese New Year, gambling.  My uncle was the one who ended up eating all our bets. I BET HE WON 200 BUCKS.  Gosh, we lost about 60 bucks. 

That pretty much sums up my first 3 days of Chinese New Year. I really hope that it's gonna be a good February ahead, especially with those exams and presentation coming up. Not forgetting about Direct Polytechnic Admission opening ceremony and orientation. There's really too much to fret over. 

*note 1: All photos are edited on hand through Google Snapseed.

*note 2: Credits to Joyce (Beloved Sister) for certain photos

*note 3: Photo from DSLR camera are not edited yet. Will update this post with more pictures later.

Update 1:

*View Full Album here: https://www.facebook.com/desmondlgy/media_set?set=a.10202181655115885.1073741829.1024330326&type=1